EIGHT FORCES THAT CONTROL YOUR MIND
The Buddha’s teaching on the four cravings and four fears that rule everyone — and how mindfulness helps you break free
“There are eight forces that control living beings in all realms. Which eight? Craving for gain, craving for fame, craving for praise, craving for pleasure, pain of loss, pain of bad reputation, pain of criticism, and pain of displeasure.” — The Buddha
Why This Matters to You Right Now
Ever scroll through social media and feel like you need the latest phone? Or check your notifications constantly, hoping for likes? Have you ever avoided speaking up in class because you were afraid of what others might think?
These are perfect examples of the eight forces at work in your daily life. The Buddha wasn’t just talking about ancient philosophy — he was describing the exact mental patterns that control all of us, especially teens navigating a world of constant comparisons and pressures.
Understanding these forces isn’t about becoming perfect. It’s about recognizing when they’re controlling you so you can make choices based on what truly matters to you, not what you’re unconsciously craving or fearing.
Part 1: The Four Cravings — What You Chase
We all want things. Sometimes we want them so badly that we can’t think about anything else. The Buddha called these “cravings” (taṇhā) — but they’re not just wants. They’re powerful forces that shape our thoughts, actions, and even our identity.
The desire to get things — money, possessions, status, followers. Not just wanting, but needing to have more.
For teens: That feeling when you’ve just bought new shoes, but you already want the next pair. Or checking your bank account and feeling anxious because you don’t have “enough.”
“When someone wants to acquire something, they suffer if they don’t get it. If they get it — they fear losing it.” — MN 118
The need to be known, recognized, and respected. Building your identity around what others think of you.
For teens: Creating content just to get views, or changing who you are to fit in with a certain group. That moment when you post a photo just to see how many likes you’ll get.
“Those who live for fame are never free — they’re slaves to others’ opinions.” — Dhammapada 75
The need for approval, compliments, and validation. This is the sneakiest craving — it often hides behind “wanting to help others.”
For teens: Always saying “yes” when you want to say “no” because you want to be liked. Or changing your opinion to match your friends’ views.
“When someone acts for praise, their actions aren’t pure.” — AN 4.196
Wanting to feel good all the time — through food, games, social media, relationships. Not wrong in itself, but dangerous when you become a slave to it.
For teens: Scrolling endlessly through TikTok even when you’re tired. Eating junk food when you’re stressed. Avoiding homework to play video games.
“Pleasure is like honey on a spear’s tip: sweet, but dangerous.” — Saṃyutta Nikāya 35.205
Part 2: The Four Pains — What You Avoid
Just as powerful as cravings are the things we desperately try to avoid. The Buddha called these “pains” (dukkha) — not just physical pain, but all forms of discomfort, fear, and anxiety. They’re the flip side of craving — and just as controlling.
Fear of losing what you have — your phone, your relationship status, your reputation. This is the shadow of craving for gain.
For teens: That panic when you can’t find your phone. Worry about breaking up with your first boyfriend/girlfriend. Fear of losing your spot on a sports team.
“The person who clings to their possessions suffers from fear of loss.” — MN 118
Fear of being judged, humiliated, or laughed at. We’re afraid of what others will say about us behind our backs.
For teens: The terror of having an embarrassing photo shared. Worry about what people think when you walk into the cafeteria alone. Fear of being called out in class.
“Those who fear bad reputation live imprisoned by others’ opinions.” — Dhammapada 76
Fear of being criticized, judged, or punished. We avoid speaking up or standing for what we believe to escape this pain.
For teens: Not correcting a teacher when they mispronounce your name. Not defending a friend when others are gossiping about them. Staying quiet when you know the right answer.
“Who fears criticism can never be free.” — AN 4.196
Fear of unpleasant feelings — boredom, discomfort, loneliness. This is the most basic fear that drives everything else.
For teens: Checking your phone during boring classes. Eating when you’re not hungry. Staying in a toxic relationship just because being alone feels worse.
“Everything that doesn’t bring pleasure causes suffering — this is the law of nature.” — Saṃyutta Nikāya 35.205
Part 3: How to Be Free From These Eight Forces
The Buddha didn’t say “stop wanting things” or “stop fearing things.” He knew that’s impossible. Instead, he taught a different approach: see these forces clearly, without being controlled by them.
Try This Week: The Force Detective
For the next seven days, become a detective of your own mind. Each time you notice yourself making a choice (big or small), ask:
- Is this choice driven by craving or fear? (For example, are you checking your phone because you crave validation or fear missing out?)
- What’s underneath this craving or fear? (Are you seeking security? Acceptance? Control?)
- Is this choice truly mine, or am I being controlled by these forces?
Don’t judge yourself — just observe. This practice develops sati (awareness), one of the Five Spiritual Faculties that leads to freedom.
Three Practical Ways to Break Free
- Mindful breathing (ānāpānasati): When you notice a craving or fear arising, pause and take three deep breaths. This creates space between the force and your reaction.
- Question your thoughts: Ask yourself: “Is this thought truly mine, or is it society/friends/media telling me to feel this way?”
- Practice small acts of freedom: Do one thing each day that goes against these forces. For example: post a real photo (not a filtered one), speak up when you’d normally stay quiet, or spend 10 minutes without checking your phone.
“When a person sees how craving and pain create suffering, they begin to search for freedom.” — MN 118
Conclusion: You Are Not Your Cravings or Fears
These eight forces aren’t your enemies. They’re actually your teachers. When you learn to observe them without judgment, you gain incredible power: the power to choose your responses instead of being controlled by automatic reactions.
Freedom doesn’t mean never feeling craving or fear. It means seeing them clearly and knowing they don’t have to determine your actions. When you can watch a craving arise and pass away without acting on it — or feel fear and move forward anyway — you touch true liberation.
Think about your breathing right now. You don’t control it — it just happens. In the same way, these eight forces come and go in your mind. Your job isn’t to stop them, but to not be ruled by them. That’s where your real freedom lives.